Ostrogoth History:  Ostronomics 101

The History of Ostrogoth is complicated.  If you were to look Ostrogoth up in an Encyclopedia you'd end up being fed a huge bucket of horse shit for sure.  To illustrate my point, here's an excerpt taken from the Microsoft Encarta Encyclopedia when I looked up Ostrogoth:

When the Huns swept into Europe about 370, many of the Ostrogoths were conquered and compelled to aid their conquerors. They joined the king of the Huns, Attila, in his expedition against Gaul in 451 and many Ostrogoths were killed by the Visigoths at the Battle of Châlons. When the Huns were finally forced back, the Ostrogoths again became independent. With the permission of Rome, they settled in Pannonia, an area now including western Hungary, northern Croatia, Slovenia, and eastern Austria. They were joined by other Ostrogoths who had taken refuge within the Roman Empire at the coming of the Asians. In 474 Theodoric, the greatest of the Ostrogothic kings, was elected to the throne. After various periods of warfare and alliance with Zeno, the Byzantine emperor, Theodoric invaded Italy in 488 (with the consent and advice of the emperor), slew Odoacer, the first barbarian ruler of Italy, and became ruler himself. He held the power although not the title of the Western Roman emperors. A Roman consul was given nominal authority, and the two peoples lived together amicably, with Roman culture greatly influencing the Teutons.

Microsoft® Encarta® Encyclopedia 2003. © 1993-2002 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.

To be honest though, its not complete horseshit.  A lot of that stuff did happen, just not they way they explain it.  First of all God plucked Theodoric from Planet Ostrogoth and gave him the mission to lead the Ostrogoths here on Earth.  Also, it was really the year 493 when Ostrogoth took full power.  Worst of all, they don't even mention the band or go into how Theodoric consistently defies death to advise Olama, the Oth Man and the Sarge!

You see, here's what happened..........a vile of Theodoric's blood was kept hidden for centuries and then injected through a transfusion into the veins of three biker buddies who lived in the Chicago suburb of North Hetnam in the early 1970's.  Each of these bikers gave birth to sons (Olama, the Oth Man, and the Sarge) who met up at a day care center and sealed the bond of their mystic connection.

The day care center operator Johnny Elias took the three of them under his wing to form the child group "The Adolescent Alcoholics."  Due to backlash from their first album, they eventually changed their name to "Ostrogoth."  The ghost of Theodoric brought the band to his home planet of Ostrogoth and began appearing to the band members in spiritual form to guide them in their lives as well as their careers.  

The historical oversights in encyclopedias were one of the main things that motivated The Oth Man to write the Ostrogoth Book.  The book sets the record straight and now that it will soon be available to the masses, maybe all of these jag offs at the encyclopedia companies will go back and fix these flawed entries.  I'm confident that time will let the truth be told on this.

To get an overview of important dates in Ostrogoth's true past head on over to the Timeline for a rundown on their historical achievements!